My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize