I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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