porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
PANTIES FOUND
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