I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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