dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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