great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
