i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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