you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
and she was petting her beer can
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I will be naked everywhere
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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