I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
