I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
