So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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