May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
