.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
