just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
