the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
