i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
