maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
