the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
