question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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