dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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