um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
