If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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