Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
