sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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