Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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