She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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