We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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