You just made me feel so damn special
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
