now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
