Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
