Are we in a gay sports bar?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I could fuck to npr.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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