Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
