No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
i black out too much to be "responsible"
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize