Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
