Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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