He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
