Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
