i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
