Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
