Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
