Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
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