Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
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