wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
