question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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