i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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