You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
fuck your aforementioned shoe
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
