That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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