His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
That accounts for only three of the penises
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
