Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
try to milk me bitch
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
