____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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